Owen and Jamie are a pair of nobodies who prevent global disasters with the help of a time-transient civil servant. Owen, a caretaker at the local school, is approached by a shadowy figure named Melvin while locking up one day. Melvin appoints him 'Caretaker of the World... Brighton and Hove Division'. But is this Melvin really a civil servant from the future or just a mad tramp? After some haggling over a scooter, Jamie agrees to be Owen's sidekick and so their mission begins: This involves the confiscation of some homebrewed beer which, according to Melvin, will become contaminated in 2013. Curiously Melvin needs it brought to him in order to 'process' it.