It's 1782 and welcome to the fabulous Palace of Versailles, France. Outside the gates, the peasants are on the verge of revolting (already well past vile), whilst inside lives one of the most hated, despised and loathed women in all of France - no, not Marie Antoinette - but Columbine, the Comtesse De Vache. Aided by her faithful maid Lisette, Columbine skulks around the palace uncovering the dark secrets of her fellow nobles, always leaving her well prepared to out-do jealous rival Madame De Plonge and her innocent yet sharp-witted daughter Eveline. Meanwhile, keeping her reputation as a classy lady is no easy chore. Whether it be a wig in the style of a 'glorious man of war, abreast in huge waves of hair' or a splendid dress to wear to a copulation, Columbine's acid-tongued courtier, Bouffant, strives the difficult task of keeping her at the forefront of French fashion.