It's Christmas Eve in New York, and Ryan's down on his luck. He lost his well-paying job at Lehman Brothers; he's sparring with his fiancée, Jennifer. And his ill-advised attempt at delivering cocaine resulted in disaster; he returned without the drugs, without payment, and with a black eye. He's afraid to meet the drug kingpin, Benbella; but he's even more afraid to run. So he arrives at the rendezvous with empty pockets. Benbella's nowhere to be found. Instead, he encounters a Greek chorus of drunken Santas; an enigmatic snowman; a beautiful barmaid; a Tony Kushner enthusiast; a post-9/11 paranoiac; and a bespectacled financial analyst, who tells Ryan the story of "the standard man."